Monday, October 17, 2005
*cross roads*
yup..read melly's blog today and something she wrote really hit me...that sometimes when we ask God to open doors for us when it comes to job opportunity and when we ask Him to close the door on opportunity that is not of His will for us, He might present 2 open doors for you and ultimately it is still your decisions as He will be with you no matter which door you choose...then what? How do you make the right decision? One in which you can live with the consequence? Seriously I was faced with that situation when I first started work here in Singapore. One firm had offered me a position then at the same time my current firm has called me up for an interview. You see I did the whole pro and cons thing in my head ...for one the company that offered was quite established here and they were in the manufacturing industry, whats more they manufactured clothes!! woohoo for me hehe...but the other firm was a MNC and location was much more central than the other as the other company was situated in Changi Industrial area, which was not reachable by public transport (they provided transport for their staff like from pick up/drop off points) which frankly was not to my liking. So anyhow, being the 'materialistic' girl that I was...I took the MNC...because of its name and prestige...( or so I thought) over the local company.
So I guess now the question is...am I able to live with the consequences, well..does the fact that I'm actually now looking for a new job tell you anything? hahaha...if talking about consequences like working in an enviro that has no career prospect and btw they have so blatantly told me, or the fact that some of your colleagues ...umm..cant make it...or that basically you don't really have a boss then yes I admit it I am not taking responsibility for my own actions. But I believe that our God is bigger than that, I will not and cannot accept that He does not want me to be happy everyday, but rather to go to work miserable and despondent day in day out...yes you might say that it is a trial that He is putting me through but I believe also that His 'trial' is not to make me miserable for such a long period of time.
I might be facing the same situation again this time round with 2 prospective govt sector asking me down for an interview, but I believe in our God and in His vision for me, that He WILL close the door that will not glorify Him. Pastor Bryan from tcc mentioned something the other day in the bible, "work for God, not for men" and that is such a powerful statement. I mean how many of us can seriously say that we work for Him and not for men, not for the satisfaction of our peers, our bosses, for our income...not many I think, I know that MY focus had been wrong, I was only looking at the approval from my superiors and not my Daddy from above. I was seeking for earthly approval and not that of what my God can give me.
I guess recently this whole issue of work has really bothered me or should I say left a burden in my heart. A heavy heavy burden...I feel so mistreated here, and have no one to talk to except for my dearest and he's been really good about it and I am indeed so grateful for his listening ear. I definitely complain to God everyday for Hes probably the only one that can stand my whining...haha...it has been a struggle to keep at this job, to perservere despite all that is going on, but I keep praying...cuz that's all I've got, that as his word says, "delight yourself in the Lord and He shall give you the desires of your heart" (Ps 37:4) And I choose to believe that as I continue to have faith, to believe, to pray that He will give me the desires of my heart for my God is faithful.
You know, I've come to realise that my priorities are so diff from what it use to be, I mean 2 years ago, my entries mainly concern about r/s, school, frens...but now it centres so much on work r/s, human r/s and my personal walk with God...think maybe I might have matured?? no??? hhahaha...I guess that comes with age and being subjected to a very diff enviro. I am really so grateful for all God has given me...really sometimes when I walk through MRT links like the one in Orchard and also Raffles where there are ppl basking or just simply trying to sell packets of tissues to earn some kind of living, it makes me so incredibly grateful and in awe of our King, that I have truly been provided for by Him, through my parents, my work and my family. That I am not at a place where I need to beg for food for money but He is Jehovah Jireh, my Provider. Our Provider. It feels so reassuring sometimes when I know money is tight and sometimes I wonder how are we going to save enough money for the wedding and all. Guess thats why they say 'walk by faith not by sight'. We are truly walking by faith, hoping and praying that He will carry us through, I know that all that has happen has truly been a blessing from him, even the postponement of our ROM. Think God has a plan for us and I am going to follow that plan.
Alrighty, my lunch time is almost up....
yup..read melly's blog today and something she wrote really hit me...that sometimes when we ask God to open doors for us when it comes to job opportunity and when we ask Him to close the door on opportunity that is not of His will for us, He might present 2 open doors for you and ultimately it is still your decisions as He will be with you no matter which door you choose...then what? How do you make the right decision? One in which you can live with the consequence? Seriously I was faced with that situation when I first started work here in Singapore. One firm had offered me a position then at the same time my current firm has called me up for an interview. You see I did the whole pro and cons thing in my head ...for one the company that offered was quite established here and they were in the manufacturing industry, whats more they manufactured clothes!! woohoo for me hehe...but the other firm was a MNC and location was much more central than the other as the other company was situated in Changi Industrial area, which was not reachable by public transport (they provided transport for their staff like from pick up/drop off points) which frankly was not to my liking. So anyhow, being the 'materialistic' girl that I was...I took the MNC...because of its name and prestige...( or so I thought) over the local company.
So I guess now the question is...am I able to live with the consequences, well..does the fact that I'm actually now looking for a new job tell you anything? hahaha...if talking about consequences like working in an enviro that has no career prospect and btw they have so blatantly told me, or the fact that some of your colleagues ...umm..cant make it...or that basically you don't really have a boss then yes I admit it I am not taking responsibility for my own actions. But I believe that our God is bigger than that, I will not and cannot accept that He does not want me to be happy everyday, but rather to go to work miserable and despondent day in day out...yes you might say that it is a trial that He is putting me through but I believe also that His 'trial' is not to make me miserable for such a long period of time.
I might be facing the same situation again this time round with 2 prospective govt sector asking me down for an interview, but I believe in our God and in His vision for me, that He WILL close the door that will not glorify Him. Pastor Bryan from tcc mentioned something the other day in the bible, "work for God, not for men" and that is such a powerful statement. I mean how many of us can seriously say that we work for Him and not for men, not for the satisfaction of our peers, our bosses, for our income...not many I think, I know that MY focus had been wrong, I was only looking at the approval from my superiors and not my Daddy from above. I was seeking for earthly approval and not that of what my God can give me.
I guess recently this whole issue of work has really bothered me or should I say left a burden in my heart. A heavy heavy burden...I feel so mistreated here, and have no one to talk to except for my dearest and he's been really good about it and I am indeed so grateful for his listening ear. I definitely complain to God everyday for Hes probably the only one that can stand my whining...haha...it has been a struggle to keep at this job, to perservere despite all that is going on, but I keep praying...cuz that's all I've got, that as his word says, "delight yourself in the Lord and He shall give you the desires of your heart" (Ps 37:4) And I choose to believe that as I continue to have faith, to believe, to pray that He will give me the desires of my heart for my God is faithful.
You know, I've come to realise that my priorities are so diff from what it use to be, I mean 2 years ago, my entries mainly concern about r/s, school, frens...but now it centres so much on work r/s, human r/s and my personal walk with God...think maybe I might have matured?? no??? hhahaha...I guess that comes with age and being subjected to a very diff enviro. I am really so grateful for all God has given me...really sometimes when I walk through MRT links like the one in Orchard and also Raffles where there are ppl basking or just simply trying to sell packets of tissues to earn some kind of living, it makes me so incredibly grateful and in awe of our King, that I have truly been provided for by Him, through my parents, my work and my family. That I am not at a place where I need to beg for food for money but He is Jehovah Jireh, my Provider. Our Provider. It feels so reassuring sometimes when I know money is tight and sometimes I wonder how are we going to save enough money for the wedding and all. Guess thats why they say 'walk by faith not by sight'. We are truly walking by faith, hoping and praying that He will carry us through, I know that all that has happen has truly been a blessing from him, even the postponement of our ROM. Think God has a plan for us and I am going to follow that plan.
Alrighty, my lunch time is almost up....
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