My JoURnEY.......

Doing my preparation for teaching the kids on Sunday, I duno Im kinda really nervous bout it. I mean, it's not that I havent taught the kids before but it was alwayz just my kids u kno, my group, not both. But the system has just changed as many of you would have heard from Uncle Peter's "mini sermon"...kekeke...but yeah n man can i just say it's not easy being a kid!!! kekeke...but i duno...kids have a way of asking you questions that can really stump you. And I've never been any good at standing in front of a group talking either. Sigh...well...I guess all i can do is my best and hope God will do the rest kekeke :P

Been thinking a while about dropping one of the ministries Im in. Being in 3 has kinda taken its toll and now especially with the Children's Church increasing the workload for teachers, I'm finding it a little hard next year when my work load in school will be slightly more. I love being in the worship ministry, I love worshipping Him, I feel like thats one of the few times where it really is just me and Him alone. No one else is in the room it's just me and God talking and me just simply worshipping and giving Him thanks through song and words. As for the leadership ministry, well I do see myself involved in that because it does concern the CZ and i know that I really do wana help out in the CZ. Hence that only leaves the Childrens church. Don't get me wrong, I love the kids i really really do. It has nothing to do with them...but i realised that as much as i love serving Him and want to do so, i cant split myself 3 ways. I wouldnt really be committing myself, nor giving my best to any of the ministries. You have no idea how much i love my group...they really are so adorable :) I guess they all are when they are 6-7 years old keke...but yeah just the other day whilst i was trying to teach them that God is with you everywhere you go...a memory verse they are suppose to know. We sort of played a game...you kno marco polo, it's sort of like that but instead, one of the kids is blindfolded and has to find a bible, the closer they are, the louder the kids will shout. Anwayz in the midst of trying to get them organised, whilst one of the younger boys ran off with my bible...hahaha...man...I was yelling after him to come back, one of the girls, Esther, she just threw her arms around me and wouldnt let go. And whilst being in the midst of getting my bible back...i didnt really notice what she did. But later when I thot about it, I realised how much I loved that. To be so close to them and to just really love them. And yes, as some say kids are fine as long as they arent yours. But with some of these kids, I have to say i really do love them. Not so much like my own but maybe like a younger sibling kind. And I know I will really miss them next year. You might think, well if i love them so much why dun i just keep teaching? I gues becuz i realised that I have to choose, I can't keep spreading myself out like this, I have to make a decision like e'thing else. I have to choose where my passion or where my path is to serve Him truly. Being in these 3 ministries is great, but if im serving Him without really wanting to or without my heart being in it...then i guess there really isn't any point. And I just don't see myself having the emotional, physical and spiritual capability to last. I really do hope I'm making the right choice, I will continue to pray bout it until I let the others know bout my decision.

Just came back from dinner with my cell, we went to sparrows...n yes it was my first time and yes...i've already got the wide-eye response of "REALLY!!" n yes let me jz repeat it in case you didnt hear...it was my first time!!! :P But it was yummy thou :) Then some of us went bowling...kekeke...can i just say i normally sux at bowling...like seriously!!! my right thumb alwayz kinda collapses on me by the end of the first round. But Im soooooo happy to say that this time...my thumb stood well upon the challenge hehe :) And let me jz say to a fren of mine (matosh)...jz cuz i whooped ur butt...kekeke....my bowling style is fine ok!!!! There is nothing wrong with it!!! I may not be as classy as SOME ppl mite think...but hey...the score says it all!!! hahahahaha :P Anwayz...I realised how much fun i had :) It was nice. :)

Alrighty...shall TRY to get some shuteye....not that il be sleeping that early but yeah...God bless :)

Have a splendid day tomorrow e'one!!!

Well, just came home from watching Tears of the Sun starring Bruce Willis and some others...keke...anywayz...the storyline is kinda similar to something of Saving Private Ryan where a platoon of soldiers go into enemy lines to retrieve a civilian...an American of cos :P so yeah...but the scene in this movie was set in Nigeria. The story kinda of impacted me a lot...it made me really really sad...I guess it got me thinking about what Mel sed bout "its a sad day for humanity" and how it has indeed become such a cliche. There was this one scene where one of the village girl was being tortured and maimed by a Rebel soldier. Her young infant had died and its cold body laid somewhere in the dirt. I will never forget how much pain she must have been in. Yes it's a movie, yes it's being exaggerated by HOllywood but do not be mistaken to think that this isn't happening somewhere out there in the real world because it is. So many women and children are being caught in the cross fire of some pathetic, insane civil war because some idiot in their government couldn't be honest and couldn't lead the people. For me i just felt such pain ...I duno...maybe cuz I'm a woman too and my God, to see your child die infront of you, I wont even attempt to fathom what that must feel like. BUt I guess what really hit me was that this wasn't just a show anymore, it no longer became some Hollywood fantasy, this WAS real!! It is happening somewhere out there. On my way home i prayed, i prayed that God will help me to somehow help those out there like that mother, like those children who have lost their parent, lost everything that ever meant anything to them. I don't know how or what to do but i do hope that i can someday, somehow. What really amazed me out of all this,...well actually i shouldnt say amazed cuz it really shouldnt amaze me at all is that at the end of it all, the fighting, the death, the pain, this one character still thank God, she still blessed one of the soldiers (a.k.a Bruce Willis) for saving her life n the lives of her companions. To know that God isn't forgotten amidst all this chaos just goes to show how amazing God is. And that even they, people who have gone through such hardship and pain could still give thanks and praise to Him, how can WE not?? Anyway i just want to encourage all of you to reach out to those around you, even if we cant' really do much for those in the far away countries, let's start the compassion here, in our own hearts, own homes and own community.

On a slightly different note, went to the doc's the other day, ummm...had a blood test..yucks!!! And going for an ultrasound on monday...man it's taking forever...well maybe not forever...but close to it. I just wana know whats wrong u kno cuz yeah I know something isn't rite...but the not knowing is kinda excruciating. Anyway, I just really hope it's nothing bad or nothing more than an ulcer which can be treated for. oh well, the only thing i can do is just keep praying i guess. And hope for the best :) Alrighty shld try get some sleep huh... God bless :)

Been meaning to blog for a while but yeah well...a stupid exam sort of prevented that from happening!!!! sheesh...well now i jz dun care...the darn exam can wait!! well..actualy it cant but...who cares..:P So yesterday a bunch of us went to Q-Zar...u know the one in Freo...yep yep we went n I definitely had fun...not that I was ever any good at the whole aim n shoot thing...im more like what Ps Benny said...'shoot then aim' kinda gal...kekeke...ok ok Im just trying to cover it up...yes i sux but at least i had fun :) which is the point rite?!?! :) After that some of us went to the Freo markets to buy the famous crepes...Im sure those of u who had those know what i mean!!! I must say they were pretty nice n yummy :) then I got dragged away by ummm...Jo who desperately wanted her toffee apple ....so yep off we went. Along the way we were at the vegie n fruit section we saw some pretty big, juicy strawberries...YUMMY!!!! kekeke...n well let's jz say i cldnt resist so i bought some. Jo wanted to buy some too but she didnt have a fridge...Im guessing yeah Currians don't have that facility...anyway n we were both drooling at the thought of strawberries dipped in choc!!! oh man how yummy is that!!! kekeke...but i felt quite bad that Jo cldnt share with me in the joy of strawberry dip in choc...well that got me tinking actually. Just how lucky I am...I guess i never really thot of it until then cuz i duno...You know how u always sort of know you're lucky but it doesnt really hit u until something happens. Yeah well it did... and i guess seeing I've never left home to go study somewhere before....i wouldnt really know what it's like to be living on my own. LIke really living on my own. And I guess i realise how precious MUMs really are :) Thanks to all the MUMs out there who make e'thing so special for us :) And i guess it also had to do wif what Ps Benny was saying on fri nite. He listed 4 Cs that would help us envision the CZ mission. Compassion, Creativity, Cooperation and Commitment. For me, the Compassion bit kinda stood out bcuz well i realised that if we don't have compassion for one another than how very sad that would be. And that's kinda of my own personal CZ mission...to start with Compassion within my own cell and slowly work on the other 3 but i guess the best place to start is alwaz wif your cell...or thats what i believe anywaz. Because your cell is or shld be like ur "home away from home" in a way. and yes even though i kno im not exactly away from home, most of my cell members are n i guess if i can make their stay here a little more comfortable being so far away from home than i guess i will do what it takes to make that happen.... be it to make strawberries dip in choc, or cookies or wateva the case may be :) I know that Jo really really love those strawberries...keke and well Im kinda really glad i made them too and some may tink that ppl do this just so they can feel good about themselves...which at times some ppl actually do. But i guess the difference for me is that doing stuff for others has never been a burden, basically bcuz i do it bcuz i want to and i don't expect anything in return. Cuz in my heart i know im doing it for the right reasons. So ppl go enjoy those yummy strawberries...keke...cuz I know I did!!