My JoURnEY.......

well just realised blogger has changed its whole look...weird thou...i mean...i thot the previous setting was quite alrite...oh well...anywaz...just had our DnD meeting...and it was a rather productive one. We got most of the finer details sorted and finalised..now its just a matter of time and effort...n it should be set to go!!! :)

Today is saturday...woohoo..one more day before we set off for monkey mia!!! yay!!! so exciting so exciting...n yes some of u mite think im nuts...but then again i already knew that :P hehe Im really forward to going away...i mean for one...its my only holiday...pretty much...and well get to see dolphins in an up-close and personal way..hehehe :) will tell u all bout my adventures when i get bk..kekeke :P

Tonight il be going to a fren's place for a gathering...it was his b'day on wednesday so yeah...quite nice of him to invite me seeing im actually his fren's sis so a bit weird but still nice of him :) But dun think il really kno anyone there...umm..kinda dun like gg to a party where majority of the time il be standing there on my own :P hehe but im gg cuz he is a fren and its his b'day afterall...plus how could i say no rite?? no seriously...i have a problem of saying no..sigh...can be a good thing...n a bad..trust me!! After the party was initially meant to meet up wif someone...but that someone said that he wasn't feeling well and might have to cancel. That someone was a person i use to date :) Strangely we havent spoken for almost 2 years. Not because we were deliberately trying not to but more of circumstance, we didnt hang around uni that much anymore and i guess i was beginning to know another group of people, my church frens. Anway, it was only until recently that he started talking to me on icq. Yes the beauty of online communication ...hahaha...but strangely enough, last nite...he asked me if i would like to meet up tonite. And seeing well i thot maybe its to catch up on things...but i thot we already did that on icq...hahaha...but nontheless...seeing i just cant seem to say no....i sed yeah sure...maybe after this party that im gg to. He was so polite about it all...saying he didnt wan to spoil my plans n if i had plans already that we cld just meet another time. But i assured him that trust me...its highly unlikely that i would stay vely long at this party seeing i hardly know a soul. So we agreed to meet up at utopia...and the whole night...i was just thinking...how things have really change. I guess a lot of it has to do with knowing God and truly understanding the meaning of forgiveness. I mean there will always be people in our lives who are going to do things that we don't like. But we are all humans, we are flawed...we are not perfect and we are all prone to make mistakes. Its in our nature, but the thing to remember is that we are all His children, and He has shown us the way to forgiveness through His son, Jesus Christ. And that He forgave us without cause, without reason, but because He loved us. I am so thankful that we serve a forgiving God, an awesome God. And i guess i want to be a channel of blessing to others to show what a wonderful God we serve. And despite both of us having gone through a rather rough patch, the fact that we can come together after so long of not really speaking to one another has taught me the beauty of forgiveness and time. Yes it does take time, it takes time to heal the wounds and to learn from what we have experienced. And believe me i"ve learnt a lot from my r/s with him. But to remember not to dwell in it for too long cuz when u do, its so easy to lose sight of whats really important. Him. So i thank God that He has brought me and him together to just be friends and to give me that peace and serenity that i've been searching for. That it is possible to really forgive and to share with someone i never thot i would see again. Thank You Lord.

God bless u all :)

Dun think im very good at the whole leadership thing...but will try...will try...try to do the best that i can, God willing. :)

Good luck to those who still have exams :) You guys will be fine...do ur best and let Him take care of the rest :) I always like this two words, 'Just Believe'. so, just believe in Him. nites all :)

Just came home from dinner with the folks.....man remind me why again did i go???? God knows why....aiyah dun take me wrong i love my parents...but trust me they are not exactly the type u can sit long long and have a long and delightful convo that kind...i mean yeah i have deep and meaningfuls wif my mum sometimes but well when they r in public...ummm...lets just say there was a reason why i stopped gg out to dinner with them too often. Anywaz...before that i had sort of an impromptu meeting with some of my comm members for the DnD. Needless to say the date is getting closer and closer...scary...but after the meeting n on my way to dinner...i realised how tired i was...not just physically which believe me cld be due to the fact that i was on worship this morn...had to wake up at an insanely hour...but i was tired mentally and i guess spiritually too. I realised that perhaps i had taken on more than i could chew. In the sense, well...i realised im actually invovled in 3 ministries. And although the 2 of the ministries could be rather small-ish but it still takes up a great deal of my time. Plus the fact well im not exactly getting a holiday this sem...with my STUPID trimester unit...darn thing!!! So i guess im running a little low on fuel if u kno what i mean...but during our meeting, i realised how tired i really was. I mean i understand yeah this is my first comm that im leading and its a new experience for me, a good one. But nontheless, its rather challenging. I realised that you cant really please e'one and thats sometimes really hard to do...esp when i have a problem of saying no to ppl, but im learning :) And im worried i guess...that the DnD isnt gg to work...i mean when we prayed today at the meeting, i was so glad that Nel sensed my vision which is what i believe is God's vision too. That is to unite the campus zone and to truly get all our people together and to prepare ourselves as well to the next group of ppl coming in next sem. And more importantly, my vision for CZ has always been to close the gap that i see and sense between the 3 campuses. And i thot that this is something that might allow us to socialise with people we may not have heard of (which believe me it happens!!! ;) ) so yeah...and to get to kno one another better and to also have fun :) I believe that in order to evangelise to others and to spread God's word, we first need to have a solid foundation, a solid campus zone. But i also realise that this is all His doing, i mean im doing this becuz of Him, becuz of the vision He gave me and because i truly believe that this is His will. And i pray that He will show me the right way, the right thing to do and more than anything, i pray He will give the strength bcuz without Him, I kno i would not be able to do this. "I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me". And i guess like i sed, it could also be just the fact that i woke up wayyyyyyyy too early for my own good and so im feeling the effects of withdrawal or sumthing!?!? But I guess im just feeling a little worse for wear...need to recharge my batteries...kekekeke...sound like a duracell bunny...kekeke ...ok gotta stop. I kno during this time is where i truly need to seek Him, and listen to Him ever more...and believe me im trying and im willing to obey...I kno and believe that God knows my heart and what im trying to do here. And i just pray that with God's hand in it, e'thing will be ok. I guess i've just got to learn to leave it in His hands, to seek His wisdom, and His advice and to listen to His words. And i guess that applies to other aspects of my life n not just in this event...but sometimes its hard u kno, i mean its always easy to say but can be hard to do. But im learning, Im learning to leave it in His hands and to take less interference in it.

I feel like im going a little mad here...(i dun mean this figuratively speaking either...kekeke) ok maybe not but i feel like i am. I feel the need to hibernate for a while...just to take time to sort out my head...not that writing doesnt do that...but i guess i need to do that in solitude, to be seeking Him. Thank you all for taking time to read my thoughts, as insignificant as they are....thank you and God bless :)