Friday, April 18, 2003
well ..been MIA for a while...its funi that word MIA... a fren of mine didnt know what it stands for..until like later i go yeah 'missing in action' then he goes 'right..i knew that'...yeah watever man...hahhaha...been sick sigh...and bz wif school...sigh...oh well now thats all over...umm...well while i've been sick..been watching a lot of t.v. hehehe..well gotta kill my time somehow right...been watching a lot of the report on the war in Iraq...n i just have to say i feel such sympathy for the children of war...they truly r the innocent souls that get caught in the cross fire. i duno if u guys watch the news recently bout this little boy who lost both his parents and lost both his arms n now they r sending him to kuwait to get treatment..wen i watched that part..my heart felt such a tug that felt so much pain and sympathy for that little boy bcuz amongst all his pain and loss he cld still put on a brave face and wave to the cameras. to me they are the courageous ones out of this madness...they are the ones that probably have lost more than we cld possibly imagine. but its just the tenacity of a young mind to overcome such trauma and they just pick themselves up again...i duno but i just felt such pain for them wen i saw how much they were suffering and wld have to suffer. i just hope that we can continue to pray for them and hope that God will protect them and watch over them...
these days i've been feeling kinda detached....not sure if thats the right word but i guess it is for now...in a sense like where i know things are happening around me but i dun seem to feel much of anything...i guess during these times i wld remember wat M said to me that sometimes during times of leadership where God is trying to mould u there are times of loneliness and i guess im beginning to understand and appreciate that now. i mean i sometimes still find myself wishing that there was that 'special' someone but i guess reading one of C's emails i realise that God has already chosen that 'someone' for me n i just havent met him yet for watever reasons. but i have to be patient becuz during this time of leadership and trials He is testing me, testing my faith in HIm. n this is one test i really dun wan to fail. that i must leave it all in His hands...not of my own will or desire but of HIs. i come to realise that in finding the right partner shouldnt just be of someone whos compatible wif me, whos of the same religion but someone whom i can celebrate God's love wif. God's love for me and him. and the choice is His not mine but His and ive come to accept that now...well at least trying very hard so yeah im gg to at least learn to do that. its such a relief actually to know that...or to like come to that realisation.
these days i've been feeling kinda detached....not sure if thats the right word but i guess it is for now...in a sense like where i know things are happening around me but i dun seem to feel much of anything...i guess during these times i wld remember wat M said to me that sometimes during times of leadership where God is trying to mould u there are times of loneliness and i guess im beginning to understand and appreciate that now. i mean i sometimes still find myself wishing that there was that 'special' someone but i guess reading one of C's emails i realise that God has already chosen that 'someone' for me n i just havent met him yet for watever reasons. but i have to be patient becuz during this time of leadership and trials He is testing me, testing my faith in HIm. n this is one test i really dun wan to fail. that i must leave it all in His hands...not of my own will or desire but of HIs. i come to realise that in finding the right partner shouldnt just be of someone whos compatible wif me, whos of the same religion but someone whom i can celebrate God's love wif. God's love for me and him. and the choice is His not mine but His and ive come to accept that now...well at least trying very hard so yeah im gg to at least learn to do that. its such a relief actually to know that...or to like come to that realisation.
"